Opening
Lenny Rachitsky (00:00:00): Many people told you your class at Stanford made them feel like their entire college tuition was worth it. Carole Robin (00:00:05): Even more rewarding for me are the, "I'm pretty sure your class just saved my marriage." Lenny Rachitsky (00:00:11): I want to talk about how to give feedback well. Carole Robin (00:00:12): I feel that you don't care and I feel you're being insensitive are not feelings, and that's where we make our biggest mistakes when it comes to feedback....
The host lowers status tension before asking the guest to teach.
Low-ego framing
Lenny Rachitsky (00:00:11): I want to talk about how to give feedback well. Carole Robin (00:00:12): I feel that you don't care and I feel you're being insensitive are not feelings, and...
Uses we/us, uncertainty, or learner framing instead of performing authority.
Accept praise cleanly
Carole Robin (00:05:19): Thank you so much for having me, Lenny. I'm delighted to be here. Lenny Rachitsky (00:05:22): I've heard from so many...
Accepts praise without shrinking from it or turning it into a performance.
Name the work
(01:03:25): Kind of along those lines, something, I don't know if this is from your book, but I saw somewhere you said that it's possible to say almost anything to almost anyone if you have the necessary...
Names a concrete strength, artifact, or contribution instead of offering generic praise.
Return warmth
even went above and beyond and did this and this. I can't tell you how much I appreciate that, how lucky I feel that you work for me. And if I'm telling you this, because if there's ever something that you...
Matches the guest's warmth and keeps the social temperature generous.
Low-ego framing
I give. Okay, so now you and I look at each other and we're like, "I don't know what the heck that's supposed to mean." And then maybe I share something about myself or maybe I ask you a question...
Uses we/us, uncertainty, or learner framing instead of performing authority.